I have a patient who has been trying to get his wife to come in to our office for ongoing headaches. This past week, he told me that he reached a level of frustration like never before. His wife was struggling with a headache, as she does often, and again failed to do anything about it. He has made several suggestions to her over the years, but she simply won’t take his advice.
Knowing many friends and family members that have had success with chiropractic care and their headaches, he began suggesting she come to our office for a simple evaluation and opinion. He has brought home literature, printed out studies, and has basically given her every reason why trying chiropractic care makes sense. She simply will not consider it.
I am a big fan of allowing people to make their own healthcare choices. It’s one of the freedoms we have in this country (for the time being). So, I think forcing someone to do something that they are not comfortable with, disagree with, or simply do not want to do would be ridiculous.
Looking at the situation from this man’s perspective, it is easy to see his frustration and hard to understand her hesitation. You likely have experienced this yourself. You sit and listen to a friend or family member complain day after day, month after month, and even year after year about a particular problem, yet do nothing to fix it.
Out of concern and love, we share information that we have to help lead those we care about to less suffering and better lives. Some may argue that all you can do is try–allowing them to either take the info and use it, or choose not to. What makes it difficult for that patient that I mentioned above, and many people like him, is not only are their advice, recommendations, and suggestions ignored, but the person that they are trying to help continues to complain about their problem.
I am guessing some readers will dislike what I am writing here, but I do believe that complaining about a problem, but neglecting to take any action to remedy the situation, is futile. Some may say it’s even rude.
That patient finally broke down and asked his wife to do one of two things… either go do something about the headaches… or stop complaining about them.
This may sound harsh, but what else is one to do. If you are around someone that constantly complains about a problem, yet does nothing about it, I think it is okay to ask him or her to stop complaining about it. On the flip side, if you are the one that has been constantly complaining about something, but failing to take any action to make change, then I think you need to consider one of two things… stop complaining… or take action.
People will often argue that they have taken action, then explain what they have tried. If the things you have tried to remedy a situation have not worked, you need to try other stuff. Because most problems have solutions, it is imperative that you try whatever you can, even when one strategy fails to produce results.
You likely know someone who complains so much about their problems, that you wonder what they would do if they didn’t have them anymore. These are the people who won’t take the advice or recommendations of those around them.
I often reflect on my own life and try to see the things that I am expending energy complaining about, but not doing anything to change. Even if it’s to myself. I catch myself telling myself to shut up, to stop complaining, and start taking action.
It is frustrating and futile to simply complain about something. If you are one of those people, I want to encourage you to take action, do something, do anything… or stop complaining. We often have the power to make change, but it takes more than just complaining. In fact, it could be as simple as calling an office like ours, making an appointment, and seeing if care like ours is the answer to those problems.