Life is short! We’ve all heard those words. Ask any old-timer if their life has gone by fast or slowly, and they will all say fast. Even you, if asked, will most likely say that you can’t believe you are already this old. Time, for all of us, is slipping by. And even though we talk about average life expectancy (approximately 79 for women and 73 for men), those are averages, with many people dying much younger. With not knowing exactly how long we have left in this life, now would be a great time to start doing the things we’ve always wanted to do, going to places we’ve always wanted to go, and saying the things that we’ve always wanted to say.
Nobody wants to be on their deathbed with regret. And it’s likely when on our deathbeds that we will ponder that most. The data shows that people tend to regret the things they did not do, more so than the things they did that they wished they hadn’t. When I first learned that, my attention perked up. I realized that regretting what we have done is futile, because what’s done is done. We can’t change the past anyway. So, that is wasted time and energy. We have much more control over what we do moving forward.
Most people talk a lot about what they want to do, where they want to go, and the things they want to accomplish, but never actually do, go, or achieve those things. It is easy to think that you will eventually get to the things you’ve always dreamed of, but without setting hard dates, fully committing, and taking action, those dreams remain just that… dreams.
There has been a lot of talk about bucket lists. I’m curious to know how many bucket lists never get beyond the paper they are written on. Aside from those bigger bucket list items, even the simpler goals often go unfulfilled. How long have you been talking about losing those ten to twenty pounds? Calling that old friend? Patching up that relationship?
One thing that gets in the way is the false assumption that we will eventually get to it. The problem is that time continues to tick away. Days, weeks, months, and years slip by quickly. Without pinning down specific dates and taking action, it will never get done. Just think about how long you’ve been talking or thinking about doing that thing.
Another hurdle is that we think we have an endless amount of time. Oliver Burkeman’s book, Four Thousand Weeks: Time Management for Mortals, is loaded with great content, starting with merely pointing out that if we live all the way to 80 years old, we only have about 4,000 weeks. That number caught my attention and got me thinking. For me, at 52 years old, that leaves me with only about 1,450 weeks left. Yikes! And it should go without saying, but any one of us could have much, much fewer weeks than that.
One more thing to think about… you’re not getting younger, faster, stronger, or more agile. Some of those things you want to do or places you want to go might be physically impossible for you to do down the road. Wait too long and you might be physically unable to travel that far, finish that project, or accomplish that goal.
To live every day like it was your last would be a bit unrealistic, not to mention dangerous. But to continue living as if you have all the time in the world is dangerous also. If you want to avoid regret on your deathbed, it is time to pin down dates, make concrete plans, and commit to doing, going, seeing, and saying all the things you’ve been talking about for so long. The time is now. The “one day… someday” mentality needs to become a today mentality… or it likely will become no-day.
