We’ve all seen or read the quote, “It’s the journey, not the destination.” If this is true, then why do we get so immersed in seeking the destination that we completely miss the journey? Why are we so goal-oriented, listing the things we want to achieve in our lives?
I have been goal-oriented most of my life. I decide what I want, lay out a plan to achieve it, then work relentlessly until I achieve it. In that process, I know now that I have underappreciated the path that it took to get where I wanted to go. I think most people are like this, and high-achievers are just worse.
I’ve recently read about several multi-millionaires, billionaires, and superstars that have highlighted the fact that it was the rise to fame and fortune that contained all the excitement, fulfillment, and fun. They look back on the blood, sweat, and tears they poured into reaching the pinnacle as the greatest part of the journey.
The creator of Minecraft is said to have fallen into a depression after selling his creation to Microsoft for billions of dollars. Once he made that fortune, he built a mansion fit for a king. Ask anyone, and they will likely say that if they were in his shoes, they would be happy. Well… he isn’t. It was doing the building, navigating the creating, and the overcoming of the obstacles that actually contained the juice.
A post made by Johnni DeJulius, ex-Ohio State wrestler and extreme adventurer, caught my attention. He was speaking to a group of young wrestlers and emphasized the importance of falling in love with competing. We all want the victory, but it’s the love of competition that creates greatness. DiJulius asks the kids, when you’re on the mat and your opponent is late to the match, do you secretly hope they don’t show, so you get the win? Or do you hope that your strongest competitor is on the opposite side of the bracket, so you have an easier path to victory? He points out that, sure…we all want to win, but winning without a fight will leave you empty. Craving the competition, embracing the hard work, and thriving on the process fills us up. The happiness is in the doing, not the getting.
The moment of achieving the goal, getting the win, or reaching the top happens in an instant, is brief, and then it’s over. If we don’t pay attention to the journey, look around along the climb, or be present during the event, we miss the biggest chunks of our lives. Most of our time is spent clawing our way to a better life, so we must welcome, appreciate, and embrace every bit of it.
I’ve seen super successful entrepreneurs reach that moment when they could finally sell what they had built. It was their goal all along. Start with nothing but a vision, work harder than they had ever worked before, put everything they have (including their soul) into making it work, navigate through major ups and downs, have something with incredible worth, then sell it for millions of dollars. It’s basically the American dream. And the dream ends with sailing off in your boat, taking off in your jet, or spending your days on a golf course or beach.
Then they feel like something is missing. They are not as happy as they thought. They get bored. And what happens next? They embark on a new mission. One filled with risk, adventure, strategy, and massively hard work.
You need to be outcome-oriented, but be careful not be outcome-obsessed. Your great life doesn’t start when you reach that next milestone… the greatness of your life is happening right now. If you think you need to get through the chaos, overcome the hurdles, and push through the unfairness to get on with your life, remember… THIS IS YOUR LIFE! Selling the company is a great moment, reaching the peak of the mountain is an incredible feeling, and staying afloat when you thought you were sunk is invigorating. Reaching the destination is satisfying, important, and worth it, but what fills us up, what fuels us, and what truly makes us happy is the journey. My latest goal… to focus more on the journey.
